The inner enemy

The inner enemy, the anti-self, the false self, the lower self - there are many names for the part of us that sometimes sabotages our highest dreams and ideals. The early Christian Gnostics called it the counterfeiting spirit. It is also called the "watchman-on-the-threshold" (dweller-on-the-threshold).

Everyone has one, but few are aware of its existence. Yet, if we are observant, we will admit that we have all seen and felt the lower self at times, when it is active in ourselves or in others.

When we say unkind words we wish we could take back, when we do things we shouldn't, when we fail to give love to friends and family, when our thoughts and actions negate our highest desires and aspirations, we can be sure we have had an encounter with the inner enemy. But even if we acknowledge the encounter, few are prepared to deal with this enemy - or even know how to begin doing so.

If you wish to overcome this inner enemy, the first step is to recognize the not-self, and understand how it works. This is the purpose is of this book (and this lecture). And of course, your enemy absolutely does not want you to read this book.

You will find out that this enemy is often very subtle: the last thing it wants is for you to know it exists. Because if you know that, you will see through its moves and traps more quickly.

It prefers to live below the surface of consciousness - like a ghost of the opera, hiding in the shadows, from where it causes havoc in your life. This hiding nature of the enemy, is one reason why it is called the "watchman on the threshold": it is a presence that resides on the threshold of conscious knowing, where the conscious and subconscious mind meet.

Many saints of the East and West have left an account of their own battles with the watchman on the threshold. All who have returned to God in the ritual of ascension have had to struggle with their enemy prior to victory.

The apostle Paul met his adversary and wrote about his struggle between light and darkness in his epistle to the Romans, "For the good that I will, I do not do: but the evil that I will not, that I do ... If I will do good, evil is present in me.

Paul had his own name for the inner enemy. He called it the carnal mind: "The carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, nor can it be.

And so we also see the watchman appear in the human ego, human will and human intellect when they are not bound by our inner Reality.

We can think of the watchman as the animal nature of man, the part of us that has no light, but only a force field of darkness at its core. The watchman is a tyrant. Archetypically, it is often depicted as a dragon or a monster. But it can - and must - be dealt with if we are to find true freedom.

For most of us, our daily encounters with the watchman present themselves as seemingly insignificant incidents. We live lives that are a mix of good (but not too good) and bad (but not too bad). The watchman comes out now and then, but we think we have things "under control. We can go on this way for years, even lifetimes.

But one day the confrontation comes, because the dragon ultimately wants everything from us: one day it will come out to devour the soul itself. The story of Saint George and the dragon symbolizes the work the soul must fulfill when it encounters this challenge. Through the power of the Christ, the dragon must be defeated: we must fight the good fight and win.

The confrontation with the not-self is one of the most important initiations on the disciple's path. It is rightfully a battle of Light and Darkness. Every day the watchman hides on the threshold, where it tries to gain entrance. It wants to enter and become lord and master of the house. But it is the Christ, and only the Christ, whose knock we must answer. So what can we do?


Source: Book introduction: ' 'The Enemy Within'.. Available at Amethyst Press.

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